Life

A reflection after the birth of my daughter

This will be a different kind of blog post. One of a personal nature. I became a father for the third time this week. The outpouring of congratulations and positive things from the fountain pen community has been overwhelming and wonderful.

Today, however, I want to talk about the impact we can have on others

This is a little self-reflective so consider yourself warned.

We have such a wonderful life here in America. Yes, there are dumb people in our country who make poor decisions, and those decisions sometimes can affect the lives of those around us or ourselves. However, as I sit and watch my newborn baby girl I can’t help but think about the kind of life I want to give her and the kind of world I want to leave behind for her. People are inherently good, for the most part, and this means that generally, we want to give the best we can whenever we can. I feel like If each person reading this can pour the positive energy that they have into the people they know, together, before we know it we can change to world for the better. Don’t get me wrong, There are a lot of things in this world that you cant fix with positivity love or kindness. But I have never seen where those things negatively affected those around me.

Without getting into religion or politics, it is important to point out that our decisions have a vast impact on the world around us.

On the day my Daughter was born, I probably told my Wife at least fifty times that I loved her and I thought she was amazing, I told the nurses and the Doctors how much I appreciated them and thanked them for their hard work. I got coffee, water, Ice chips and the like for several people. These were just a few of the positive things I put back into the world in one day. Now I may sound a bit like a hippie here, and please excuse me if I do, but It felt good to be a force of positivity, especially on that day. But why that day?

Two days later I was hollering through the phone at some customer service rep who wasn’t getting me the answers I needed so my newborn daughter could have a couple of blood tests she needed to check her bilirubin levels. There was some mix-up and it resulted in my having to wait an extra hour or so. Is my time so valuable that I cant just hold my horses? Apparently, I thought so at that moment. But going back to the impact our actions and decisions have, I know how it feels to be on the receiving end of a call like that. Negativity breeds negativity. How many people had an ass-chewing or got hollered at because I chose to be a turd and get impatient?

I was so helpful and kind on the day my daughter was born because It was about me…

I was going to get to meet my new little girl. I was also mean just days later because it was about me. I was wasting my time.

I might be spinning my wheels, but it’s important to ponder things like this because the more thought I put into my actions, the more thought WE put into OUR actions, the less likely we will be to fly off the handle and cause someone distress that we otherwise never would have intended.

Just imagine how much it means to a child for their parent to tell them they are proud, or that they are loved. Think of how it feels when a co-worker tells you your hard work is appreciated. These things should be more common than getting yelled at because you aren’t going fast enough or because you made a simple mistake. Life is too short to walk around being a negative nanny.

A final note on this new father’s ramblings and I will be done; I tell all of my new Sailors who report in, “I expect them to be the change they would like to see in their working environment. You want people to work harder? Work harder yourself. Do people need to learn to pick up after themselves? Make it a point to keep your work area as clean as you can. If you find that others are taking too long to do the simple things, help them to become more proficient. Doing these little things will improve yourself, and more importantly the team around you.”

Likewise, We should all aspire to be the change we want to see in the life we find ourselves in, and next time, I will try not to holler at the very slow person on the other end of the phone, maybe they are just learning to be a little bit more proficient.

Think of the impact these things will make in the world we leave to our children…

Have you ever written in a journal or a blog in this manner?

Let me know what you think below as If this kind of self-reflecting post is interesting I might do a few more sometime.

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  • Meline
    January 12, 2018 at 7:58 pm

    Hi, Josh!
    To my way of thinking 🤔 it took a lot of courage and humility to write what uou did, and I admire that. I also want to say that I saw myself in those very things you talked about…specifically in the way I have reacted in similar situations. And that is so humbling! To realize that the same person can be an “angel” or a “hot-head” depending on how the situation affects “me”. Thank you for sharing this reflection…I think it’s something we all need to be reminded of at times. That being said, I also believe, like you, that this community is full of wonderful people who most of the time tend to fall in the “angel” category! Have a blessed weekend! 😇